The Duggar Deal

To whom it may concern .

         This is my input about the Josh Duggar scandal. I like others have watched the show but deep down  I knew that there was something hidden under all the religious facade. But I could not figure it out .  Until the side hug .  That's right the side hug. I thought in a tight family , hugs are a sign of love and trust. But a side hug ? Hmmm .  That creates distance and mistrust . I cant help but think that the Duggar parents created the side hug to keep the sex parts away from each other . Right ? In most families a hug is a hug but coming from abusive childhood myself . I seen the patterns . So there had to be a reason behind it and now we  know Josh is a child molester .That explains a lot . I have read the things that others have had to say about all of this and some say he was a child.  He was 14  like that excuses his behavior , and he should be forgiven.What ?! Sounds like excuses to me . Excuses,  excuses, excuses, their is no excuse for harming a child .  That's all most like saying I'm sorry after you have just  hit me in the face and then you hit me again .Saying I'm sorry does not mean you feel bad for me because my face is now bruised and blackened , it is just an admission of guilt in my book.  I have been abused mentally and physically and I'm sorry does not mean anything other then you know hit me in the face .Well , I know you hit me , My face hurts .    I am 44 and when my mother took me from Joe  (my daddy)  I was molested by aunts and uncles( her brothers and sisters) who were ALSO children who ranged from the age of 8 to 18 and that does not make it okay .  And to this day they have never said im sorry . So I guess they meant it . If a person never admits that they have molested another person then in their mind they have not done wrong .And I still carry that with me and at times and  it will not go away . ( LIKE NOW! ) Being held down by force and  being tied to a wall by family members so they can have their way with you . Being forced to do things that no little girl should EVER have to  experience in a life time , while they do what ever to you while you cry and scream for your mother who never comes , but because you are so small and your parents are gone It didn't matter to them . Because they can't get caught doing  vile and evil things . It does not make it okay . They should be punished, as should he .What kind of kids were they ? who does that to a child . I am glad i can not remember all of what was done to me . It took a lot of therapy to get this far.  It does not matter what kind of person he is now . He is a sex offender and should treated like one . At 14 one knows right from wrong and he was wrong !  And so was his family to cover it up. As was mine ! You can not push it  vile behavior under the carpet and forget about it .Eventually there will be a large lump in the floor . Crimes like this do not go away . Families that try to act perfect are far from it . He will burn for what he has done and so will those who helped him hide it . And as far as my family . I have no family from my mothers side . When my mother died and than Grandfather died that was the only family I had and as for the rest of the aunts and uncles with the exception of 2 aunts they  have always treated me like I wasn't family .  My heart is not broken for them  . I  make my own family and as I reach out to family I have not known. I will protect you with my life if needed .I will be there for you . I try to be a kind and understanding . I am an honest and peaceful person living out  my life . I try not to hate those who have hurt me, just for the fact that hate gets you nowhere , but I hold no sympathy for child molesters , even if they themselves are children.   Much light and love to you who have been hurt.

Social Media

    What a day yesterday was , I have come to find out that one of these social media conglomerate has  become a pain in my side , But, through it all I will move on . But this first , One has FB for staying in touch with children that have left home , family memebers that may be far away , I found it a place to stay in touch in some moronic way, I too have fell victim to its ease of trying to stay in contacts with those that are away from me . Being able to see post that they put up as and One corresponds by liking and what not . A place to see a steal a glimpse at people that have been ripped out of Ones life. 
    But ,  I am sad and worn out , tired and heart broken and left unknowing of results of yesterday and today . I hate that Facebook has become a place where some come and communicate . Like it is easier to go there and not know what's going on and miss communicate feelings and emotions by seeing pictures or reading posts and not know what going on  instead of staying in touch by phone or letter , by card or box. I admit it is a faster way to communicate But, It has also made it easier to be distant , Easier to be Hurt by not knowing , Angry perhaps because One feels left out of something Joyful or something Sad , Isolated from those you love  , Helpless for not being able to be closer when their is an illness a death . Frustrated because One can not be with those they care about  to share in a moment . Whatever that moment maybe.
    When did we lose touch as a Family ,as Human Beings ? 
    Why do we make it harder on ourselves when we are already  away from those we love ? 
    When do we forgive misunderstandings ? Why Is it easier to Hurt? I could tell someone I love them for who they are .No matter where they live . No matter what they do , or how they  it ,or who there are doing it with ,as long as they are happy . I could careless .

When will love once again be enough ? I am ready for Peace and being able to Heal.To grow past this and once again be whole and happy. For you and for me .For humankind . Why most people is hurt each other . When did we a humans become so busy that we can not even pick you a phone ? Or write a letter  ?   I came to Google+ to make contact with like minds because Facebook has drama that infects what use to be all the sane people I new a know its like they have been infected with so sort of ,Heck ? I dont know . Something! that has rotted their their souls and made them hard . Whats? up with that ? 

She will be heard .

To whom it may concern ,
       
             I have had enough . I am tried of students in school not being heard . Someone has to stop it . Stop the faculty from thinking that they are so sort of Gods . That a student is just a filler in a set , that has no voice to be heard . And no choice but to sit and take it . Perfectly great kids being knocked down by words and actions that come from their teachers that have no clue what is going through the mind of that student . And by this I am not saying all teachers are like this , but  rather here in Randolph county N.C.  it is that way . I don't know how many times I have had to go to South West High School to deal with a inconsiderate teacher for behaving badly  . They have idea  at any time what is going on in a student's mind nor do they seem to care , but when it comes to my student, my child . I will not let them get away  with the remarks the say or the actions the do . My child has be ridiculed and made to to think she has no worth . They accuse her of lying and skipping . They have made comments like''ONLY CUTTERS WEAR T-SHIRTS LIKE THAT or '' Im saying you're lying but''. But nothing ! Who knows how many students drop out of school or even worse commit suicide due to the way that the grown ups treat them in these schools . Words hurt worse  when they come from someone you looked up too . I would much rather be beaten then to have someone call me a liar and I am grown woman .
 And I have  beaten when I was a student in high school  maybe not by a teacher but by someone I looked up to for a time . I know a broken bone will mend ,  I know a bruise will fade , but  I also know that words have the ability to stay with you for a lifetime . Those words still will haunt me to this day . Sure I am grown now but at times , Times like this those words have a way finding me and I hurt all over again . 

Heart Broken,

    What a day yesterday was , I have come to find  that one of these social media conglomerates has become a pain in my side .But , through it all I shall will move on . I will say this first , One has FACEBOOK for staying in touch with children that have left home , for family member that are far away, for friends that one can not see everyday . I have  found it a place to stay in touch in some moronic way. I too have fell victim to its ease of being able to see post or picture that an absent family member and friend that I miss may  put up , As a way  One can correspond with by liking or making comments back and forth or what not . A place to see and  steal a glimpse at people that have been ripped out of Ones life. 
     But , I am sad and worn out , I am tired and  I am heart broken and I am left unknowing of results of yesterday and  the day before and the day before that . I hate that Facebook has become a place where some go and miscommunicate .  Like it is easier to go there and not know what's going on and miss read and interpret feelings and emotions instead of staying in touch by phone or letter , by card or box . It has become easier to go there and  be distant with each other . It has become easier  to be Hurt because One feeling left out of something  or Angry  because One doesn't know what going on. It is easier to be Frustrated because, One feels Helpless  for reason such as , perhaps they can't be somewhere  or with someone when there is an Illness or a Death ,or a Birthday, or a Holiday, what have you? So,it is easier to feel Isolated and Alone then it is to pick up a phone and find out for Oneself . 
   And yes, One may encounter hurt feeling by others that may pick up the phone because ,they have not heard from you in what may seem to be months or years even. But, One can also achieve that same misunderstanding when you text them after said months and or years even due to being so ''Busy''. They are hurt because you haven't called and messaged .
    When did it become easier to be Hurt and Angry ?
    When did we lose touch as a Family, As Human Beings?
    When did we lose the ability of making things personal? 
    Why do we find it harder to forgive the misunderstandings created on these social networks  ? 

When will love once again be enough to span the distance and bridge the gap between one another ? I am ready for this Peace and being able to start to Heal one another .To grow past all of hurt and pain that we feel towards each other due to the misunderstandings and once again be whole and happy. For Peace . I dont know what tomorrow will bring . I hope understanding . I am told time heals all wounds I pray to the Goddess of Light and Love that this if true . Why must we  hurt each other, when we ourselves or hurting ? When did we as human beings become so busy that we can not even pick up a phone ? Or write a letter  ?   I go other places now  to make contact with like minds because Facebook has caused me so much grief and sorrow due to the fact that other have sent me text messages that family members are either dying or dead ,Or it is a place to have hurt feeling sprawled out for the whole world to see . It has become a place for distance .And I  am no longer happy here in my own skin does to misconceptions left from these cold social networks. We have become  infected with so sort of thing  ,Heck ? I dont know . Something ! that has changed us and made us hard . 

    How do we go back ? 

    How can we fix what is broken ? 

    How can we mend all the wounds that we have conflicted on ourselves and those that we care so much for ? I could say I love you a million times , I could say  I'm sorry ,But does that help the Hurt, the Anger, the Frustration, the Helplessness, the Isolation ?  When will we no longer be too busy to reach out to one another ?

Social Media Rant ,

What a day yesterday was ,
     I have come to find out that one of these social media conglomerate has  become a pain in my side , But through it all I will move on . But this first , One has Facebook for staying in touch with children that have left home ,Family that may be far away .I found it a place to stay in touch in some moronic way. I to fell victim to its ease of disconnection . Being able to see post that they put up as One way to  corresponded with said family or friend ,away to span the distance to stay in touch in what has become busy lives , by liking and what not .
    A place to see a steal a glimpse at people that have been ripped out of Ones life. 
   But , I am sad and worn out , tired and heart broken and left unknowing of results of yesterday and today . I hate that Facebook has become a place where that is the only means of  communication . Like it is easier to go there and not know what's going on and miss communicate feelings and emotions instead of staying in touch by phone or letter , by card or box. It has become easier to be distant . Easier to be hurt and angry, because those that are "Too busy''  end up getting  their feelings hurt, because they see something and don't going on and it is easier to fly off the handle about something they know nothing about because they are too busy to pick a phone.  
     When did we lose touch as Human Beings ?
    When did we become so busy that human contact is now becoming extinct?
     Where did contact and siveal communication go ?
      When do we forgive? 

When will love once again be enough ? I am ready for Peace and being able to Heal.To grow past this and once again be whole and happy. For you and for me .For humankind . Why most people is hurt each other . When did we a humans become so busy that we can not even pick you a phone ? Or write a letter  ?   I came to Google+ to make contact with like minds because Facebook has drama that infects what use to be all the sane people I new a know its like they have been infected with so sort of ,Heck ? I dont know . Something! that has rotted their their souls and made them hard . Whats? up with that ? 

A broken Heart,

My Daughter Cherokee , has been battling an illness for sometime now and they are looking for the cause ,  with no luck so far . But, they have actually just started to take a more serious look . I want my daughter to be happy . I mean who knows what’s is in store for her with this . And she was so looking forward to  being able to finish a job all the way through from star to finish  .And she has shown up to that place being so sick to the point of vomiting and she pushed on not taking her well being in consideration and she has been  trampled on by customers from that stupid Spooky Woods. She took pride in not missing a day even after being fallen upon she showed up the next day  .  She has scared in the cold just like  many others to be a part of something bigger than her sickness . And through it all she got up and went to that place .That was something she loved to do . And I am proud of her strength that is a part of her I had not seen until now . She made so many friends . And someone called her last night and told her that her spot was removed due to her not being in her spot or something like that ,  when , she was taking a break ! She had  2 more days left until she would of  finished .And they took that from her . . She is crushed. Its like all the life has been pulled from her . That stupid job made her feel normal apart of something . I try to be a peaceful person but I am finding it hard to be peaceful right now . I don’t know what is in store for my daughter a long happy life I hope. Or a brief one  filled with life and adventure . We wont know until we know . I just wanted her to be happy in this time of uncertainty that  she is going through. She needed that . And the heartless staff even unfriended  her on face book making her feel even worse .Why would they do that ?  She is sick and they have no idea what they have done . It is hard to believe that people are that  careless that they can crush a spirit with the click of a mouse  . She pushed herself to accomplish this and they just took it away from her . My heart breaks

Canning

 I have been canning like crazy . I received a caner for Christmas and after I have gotten the hang of it I have canned my heart out . From Tomato Juice to ,Tomatoes , Pickles, Peppers, Chicken noodle soup , Beans . Gosh, just what ever I can , CAN . I do . I find it so much more satisfying to know exactly I am feeding my family , and neighbors . lol  I grow it and can it or freeze it . I find it opening up a whole new taste pallet for me and my whole family . Healthier the better and I save so much money not having to buy canned foods at the grocery stores . I find myself thinking about what things I can plant in my gardens that I can put to good use  in my pantry . This year I have an abundance of Tomatoes but I have found out that I have many friends that grow gardens and we trade out what one has for what one doesn't have so It is working out very well . Next year will only get better .  

I am so proud of my Tomatoes .I can not believe how big they are getting these are where the big Yellow Tomatoes came from they are lower in acid I here they taste so sweet awesome for juice .

Huge Tomato Plants

I am so proud of myself . Just to be doing something so great for my Family and friends.

 Second Batch Pick                    

Tomatoes

Peppers and Carrots

The Peppers and Carrots and Onions I found on 

the internet.

I have been making my own cooking oils for several years . 

 I love my new way to 

feed my family . I say new way because It is new to me.

Italian beans